okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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