I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
