i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
