just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Oh god it's open bar.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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