i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
