So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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