I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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