I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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