Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
