I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize