i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
