i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
