at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
