That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize