My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
