Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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