69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
