I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
