I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
