her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize