I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize