why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
