pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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