i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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