So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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