Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize