I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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