New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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