thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
