no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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