it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
