my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
