Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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