I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
