Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
And the cops told us we were all naked.
it glows. i had to have it.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Randomize