Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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