I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
