If i come over, it means nothing
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
