At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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