Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I think I have vodka in my lungs
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
