Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Sorry my hands just texted you
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
