I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
