I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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