please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
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