Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
we're making bets on your personal life
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
