I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
