Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
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