btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
