I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i dont even know how to be here
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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