So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
