We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
