Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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